So many feelings this week: It was the week when most Whole30 folks quit (update: I didn’t quit). It also happened to be a week full of stressful work stuff (not bad stress, just busy stress). There was also a dinner on the night of Prince’s death where a plethora of tapas and adult beverages were passed through my trembling hands…that I then had to pass to the person sitting next to me. Then there was Prince’s death, which made me want to eat all of my feelings. And here I am at the weekend with more challenges facing me. What challenges specifically you may ask?

Well, my 4-year-old asked for THESE this morning.

This morning I watched every single person in my family eat these forsaken things with syrup dripping from their chins. Not that I was paying close attention or anything. I stayed strong and made this for me instead:

There’s probably too much fat with the bacon and avocado, but I figured I’d splurge a little this morning given the fact that I was staring at pancake eaters across from me. By the way, the only bacon I can eat on Whole30 is this brand:

For lunches, I’ve been eating Hamburger Soup. You can just google “hamburger soup and Whole30” and you will find plenty of recipes.  I also eat carrots with Wholly Guacamole and a little fruit.

I think the big kicker came when we decided to get some cheese dip (queso) for the 4-year-old. I think he is trying to sabotage me. First the pancakes and now this. Nonetheless, we found ourselves at El Barrio and there I was staring at a bowl of cheese dip that I couldn’t eat. I happily crunched on carrots, celery, and jicama dipped in guacamole, which was delicious, but let’s not kid ourselves. I wanted the cheese dip. And an adult beverage. Even though I didn’t get any of the cheese dip, it looks like the 10-month-old will follow in my footsteps because today was her first experience with it and there’s no going back.

So I ended up getting a barrio salad with no cheese. I asked for the chicken to be cooked in olive oil (not vegetable or canola oil and definitely not butter). I also asked to sub the dressing with lemon and olive oil only. Also, don’t forget that many places will give you crudites (carrots, celery, zucchini) for dipping in guacamole instead of chips. I used that trick when I had gestational diabetes!

All of this to say, I’m closing out Day 13. Almost halfway there. Many friends have asked if it is making me feel better and it is hard to say at this point. I feel better, more alert, less guilty, and no sinus issues in two weeks (which is huge). I don’t feel as sluggish during the day or even in the mornings (the mornings are usually the hardest for me). I’m changing the way I see food in that I realize that I can indulge every now and then but I shouldn’t be indulging every single day at every single meal. You get what I’m saying, right?

I simply mean that I don’t need to drink a half gallon of half&half with my 5 cups of coffee in the morning, snack on random things I find at my desk, get the fries with the grilled cheese for lunch, find some reason to get something sweet after an afternoon meeting, and then drink adult beverages while dunking tortilla chips in cheese dip and finally finishing out the night with a handful of M&Ms. That’s pretty much were I got only because I wasn’t thinking about food. I was thinking about everything else, really. I guess one of the biggest gifts Whole30 is giving me is the ability to think about food again.

I appreciate everyone’s support (including the super kind restaurants I’ve visited this week). I’m the “no sugar, no butter, no grains, no dairy, no vegetable/canola oil, no honey, no nothing” girl sitting at their tables trying to make it work and every single restaurant worked it out with me. That helps.

Today was one of the prettiest days I’ve seen in a very long time, which made the whole cheese dip thing a little easier. I said a LITTLE easier.

Making next week’s menus soon, so stay tuned for that plan.